This year, my birthday is on the same day of the week I was born: Tuesday, May 25. I'm excited by that, rather than the birthday itself. I like patterns and repetition.
But I digress.
In this time of redefining myself, I was drawn to an article in January's issue of Wired magazine. There was a brilliant statement about a woman who, with a significantly increased risk of both ovarian and breast cancers, chose to have both a complete hystorectomy/oopherectomy as well as a double mastectomy. A mother of two, she endured these radically preventative measures as the result of thoroughly weighing her options. She utilized the process of a decision tree, something which the Wired article goes into more depth. The statement that stood out for me the most:
For Smieja, the decision was traumatic to navigate. But ultimately it came down to her desire to reduce her risk through all available means. That meant waiting a few months to wean her baby, then having the procedures. “I’m done with that decision,” she says. “This is what I need to do. I need to be around for my kids. I am not my ovaries. I am not my breasts.”
In a truly physical way, Smieja redefines herself. An inspiration, a pause for reflection. A moment to simply appreciate.
What does your decision tree look like in your infertility journey?
3 comments:
My decision tree is barren too...I went through much of the same as the lady in that article.
I was 23. It sucked.
Sometimes I wonder had we been a little more proactive about our diagnosis if things would have turned out differently. If maybe my eggs would have cooporated better.
Most of this reflection comes when I think about our ectopic pg 2 years ago. If only I had demanded an HSG before that last cycle of clomid. If only I had taken a pg test sooner, instead of waiting until my tube burst. If only I had made my dad take me to Kaiser instead of the local hospital.
Regardless of the decisions we have made in this journey, we did the best with what we were given. And deep down I do believe things happen for a reason. I may not understand why they happen, but if it makes me a better parent, then okay.
My birthday is on May 25th too :)
I really appreciate you posting about the decision tree. It never occurred to me to use one to make treatment decisions, but it makes total sense. Things carry different risks, with different costs. Hmmm...I'm sensing an upcoming project.
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