No answers just yet.

I managed to fail a breast exam today. My doctor's words, not mine. He says I can't be pregnant b/c I "failed my breast exam." I assume that since I had a mildly bemused "that tickles" expression on my face as opposed to clawing at his face while he did my breast exam means I failed. My urine sample also came up BFN... for now.

Lots of bloodwork, measuring lots of hormones. A pelvic exam that revealed I've definitely got something on my right ovary. Doc thinks it might actually be a cyst. I have an ultrasound first thing in the morning to confirm.

I'm fucking amazed. My doc is a little bit too.

For POF, there are two scenarios: 1) My ovary is like a carton full of bad eggs; or 2) My ovary is wearing earmuffs and can't hear my pituitary gland screaming at it to do stuff; or, a combination of the two. My doc thinks I might fall into the second category, and that for whatever, the shit ton of FSH I pumped out managed to find one good receptor that's not being blocked by anti-ovarian antibodies and that maybe, just maybe, it made one good follicle produce an egg this cycle. And the corpus luteum is what's created the cyst that's causing me pain on my right ovary.

Given all of my symptoms and what he felt during my pelvic exam, my doc says he's fairly confident that I've ovulated this month. So, if Ari and I timed it right, this could have worked. I have about a 1 in 3 chance, according to my doc, that we could be pregnant. I'll take those odds over the original 6-8% chance I could ever get pregnant on my own I was originally given.

He's strongly encouraging me to get on birth control for about 6 months, stop abruptly, and then see if I ovulate again. Seeing as how I need to be on HRT anyway, it kind of kills two birds with one stone. I need to see what's up with my blood test results, pap smear, and ultrasound tomorrow, but I think I'll probably wait things out and see if I can get my body to do this naturally again. My doc cautioned that it's as likely I could ovulate next month as much as this could have been my own cycle for 2010. It's a toss up. But, as my doc put it, it's the first good news I've had in almost a year.

So in a weird way, I'm kind of in a 2ww. For the first time in 14 months, I'm waiting for my period.

Weird. And... amazing, encouraging, exciting.... hopeful.