This weekend A and I took a "daycation" out to the farthest corner of our state to just relax and get away from everyone and everything, even if just for 24 hours. No email, no internet, no phone calls... nothing. Just "us" time.
Between A's layoff and my Dx, we really just needed a weekend to ourselves to focus on ourselves. A nice dinner. A movie. Some wine. A comfy bed. A scenic area we'd never been to. Hell, we even worked in a couple of hours at an art museum, something we haven't done in a while. The best part of all, is that most of the times we asked each other, in our comfortable moments of silence: "Whatcha thinkin' about?" we answered: "Nothing."
No questions for the doctor. No fears about other hidden issues or diseases. No profound sadness over the fact I probably won't have biological children, or reluctant acceptance that egg donors will probably be the way to go. No feelings of disappointment- to my husband, my family, my friends... myself.
It was only 24 hours, and yet, it did wonders for my emotional state over the last month.
Tomorrow I get my estradiol, FSH, and LH retested. (Note to self: drink water continuously between now and tomorrow morning so they don't have to draw blood from the backs of my hands like last time.)
Friday, it's sit-down with the doctor time. Thankfully this is a busy week at work, and I've had a great weekend to wind down to an almost Zen-like stopping point, so hopefully, I won't be completely off the walls by Friday afternoon.
2 comments:
I'm so glad you had a nice weekend away from everything. I'll be thinking of you Friday. Leave me a comment if you need to talk. ((HUGS))
The whole infertility journey is tough on your relationship. I think a day like that now and again is essential to remember that you got married because you are good together, not just to have children. I did much the same thing this past weekend I feel so much better for it. I'm glad to hear you do too. Emotional batteries need recharging.
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