October 21, 2009

I haven't disappeared...

I'm just overseas! Ari and I are wrapping up two incredible weeks in Japan, staying with relatives of mine. We've been to Nara, Osaka, Tokyo, Kobe, Hiroshima, and tomorrow we're heading to Kyoto for two days and Jidaimatsuri, a huge costumed festival.

This trip has provided the perspective of a lifetime when it comes to IF:

1) I'm feeling a lot better about things. Japan has given me the distance to really look at things from a renewed perspective. Is the overall situation shitty? Yes. My outlook however is greatly improved.

2) I'm not as adverse to adoption as I once was, after seeing literally dozens of adorable Japanese babies everywhere. Would I be picky and only adopt from Japan? Yes, yes I would, and apparently it's complicated like any adoption process, but apparently not that difficult.

3) Allowing myself to grieve, even while on vacation, is OK. Case in point: at the Kiyomizu Temple in Tokyo. Oft venerated by pregnant women and those trying to conceive, I was literally just overcome with hope and wanting. And you know what? That's totally OK.

I'm thinking of going to the RESOLVE Bay State Conference on November 7 - any fellow Massachusetteans out there want to join me and meet up?

1 comment:

Gil said...

I'm glad you're enjoying your time in Nihon. I wish I could go back! I miss it terribly. But I'm happy that it's given you some space and perspective. Just enjoy it for now and when you return, keep that uplifted spirit with you.