February 21, 2011

In Consideration of the Car Seat.

Ain't she a beaut? Too bad she can't really drive up hills.
My lease is up in April, so it's off to the car dealerships we go. That's me in 2008, just a couple of days after we got my Civic Hybrid. I named my first new car Barracuda. True story: I was really into Guitar Hero at the time, and played that song almost daily. I was so excited to get a new car; I had been driving my aunt's old Mercury Tracer that got into an accident on my way to work (I'm fine, the car was not). Shopping for the car was fun and exciting, our first big purchase as the new Mr. & Mrs. Zoll. Barracuda has had a good run and if we had to do it all over again, I would have probably picked another car. Don't get me wrong: I've enjoyed the yuppie smugness that comes with owning a hybrid, but I've realized after three years of driving her, I also enjoy things like horsepower and a spacious trunk.

Trunk space issues aside, it's the horsepower that kills me: 108 horsepower. That's all she's got. It makes things like "merging into high speed traffic" and "driving through snow" or the ever fun "just trying to accelerate up a slight hill" um, how shall I put it... extremely fucking difficult challenging? So yeah, when we turn in Barracuda, I'll be shopping for another vehicle. Not to wander too far into car shopping territory, but I'd like to stick with Honda. They make some damn solid cars, but they haven't updated the Civic since 2006. For the price, I'd like to see something new.

We're toying with the idea of Hyundai, Toyota, and perhaps Scion, although according to Car and Driver, they're built more for audiophiles than car lovers. We also plan on checking out Subaru, but they might be out of our price range. And then there's Fiat, finally coming to the US in just a few weeks (first demo car gets to Worcester next week!) which thanks to our love of the UK's Top Gear, we're really excited at the possibility to test drive the Fiat 500. We're also seriously considering Volkswagon, and if the old Routan Boom commercials with Brooke Shields are to be believed, it should cure our fertility woes pronto!



This is what I like to call a commercial that tries WAY too hard to be funny. Way to hard.

Basically, I'm in the market for something compact, 4-door and with more than 120 horsepower. Good gas mileage is a bonus, but not a deal-breaker. Oh, and room for a car seat. Yes. Room for a car seat. Shopping for a car is now remarkably similar to when we were looking to buy a house: 3 bedroom - a master bedroom, an office, and "room to grow."

I want to be optimistic about pursuing IVF, I really do. But the fact of the matter is that there's no guarantee if this is going to work. So once again, we are in the market for a major life purchase that will hopefully fit our hopes to build our family, but like the "room to grow" - well, there's just no guarantee we'll be able to fill that space. Infertility is so much about that sense of emptiness, of space we desperately want to fill, be it spare bedrooms, car seats, or the aching in our hearts.

Infertility has also filled me with a (un)healthy dose of pragmatism so that part of me totally realizes we can plan for a car seat as much as we want to - doesn't mean we'll ever buy one. Bleak, yes, but I'm just being a realist. Infertility has taught me that nothing is guaranteed in life.

I know this post is a bit of a downer. I try to write about what life is really like for someone dealing with IF. I probably come off as neurotic and I don't care. But this is the reality of things: even buying a car is fraught with the stress of whether or not we'll be able to have children. 

As much as I would love to drive around that sporty, zippy little Fiat 500, it's completely impractical for strapping in a car seat. I also don't want to drive around a mammoth minivan because I'm just not a minivan kind of gal. (My dream car is a cream Mini Cooper with black racing stripes. Again, not really suitable for children or even groceries.) We're still toying with the idea of whether we lease or buy, so our next car, if we're so blessed, could potentially see us through the late elementary school years of a young child.

Or maybe that back seat stays empty. We just have no way of knowing right now, but we need to plan for the best case scenario. I just can't help but remain somewhat skeptical until I'm proven otherwise.

Let's lighten up the mood, shall we? What kind of car do you drive? What do you love/hate about it? I'm in the new car buyin' market, so don't be shy ;)

17 comments:

Christie said...

I know exactly what you're talking about! We bought a new (to us) 2008 Nissan Altima last winter and the one reason we bought it was that it was larger than our other two cars and would potentially hold a car seat (or two?) well. 14 months later and that back seat is still empty, but man, I sure love the extra room when going on road trips! And we discovered we can haul 7 garbage bags and two boxes full of bottles/cans to the bottle depot in this car! It's a keeper, even if the original "plan" for the car never works out.

All the best with car shopping!

Colleen said...

That cream mini cooper comes in a four door now. Just sayin.

Meg said...

We bought a 2010 Nissan Versa Hatchback in the fall. We love it. It is a sub compact, but actually really spacious. My 6ft 2in hubby can fit comfortably in the back seat even with both front seats all the way back.

It has great gas mileage and is really comfortable to be in for long periods of time. The best part is the roof is not low so you feel like you are in a larger car even though you are not.

M3MU said...

I've got a Jeep Grand Cherokee and LOVE it however it chugs down gas like no other. We're browsing cars too and wondering what to get. Sedan? Wagon? Smaller SUV? It's a crappy decision to need to make when a lot is based on the what if factor.

Ashlee G. said...

I just bought a 2007 Toyota Pruis,and I love it. But like you know, is kinda a wussy car. Even the horn is pathetic sounding. But I love it. My husband also bought a Toyota Tacoma and he is in love with it. We're fans of Toyota and they're known to last.

Good luck with the hunt. It's so hard to try and plan for the future when you know that the future is not guarenteed. Keep us posted on this fun new adventure of car shopping!

dspence said...

I've been reading for a few weeks and am really enjoying your voice. Thank you!

I love my Accord and, like you, want to stay with Honda. I'm considering the CRV. Room for the carseats, plenty of trunk space, way cooler than a minivan.

Good luck in all things!

Anonymous said...

This is so true! We are looking at houses, and I am trying to find something appropriate for every scenario - if we have a child, if we don't...if we have multiple children...I want a family friendly neighborhood in case we do have children, but not TOO family friendly, in case we don't.

I have a Jeep Liberty, and I really like it. It uses tons of gas, though. We actually got it because we thought we were going to adopt a retired greyhound, but we ended up getting a mini dachshund instead. :)

Julie said...

We definitely bought our new car (a Chevy Equinox) because my criteria were 1) American car company, 2) high safety rating, 3) leather seats that can easily be wiped up if something is spilled on them, 4) enough space in the back row for two car seats, and 5) enough space in the trunk for groceries/some large item AND a folded-up stroller. So... yeah. Everything gets planned around future children who we can't seem to make-- cars, vacations, how long we'll live in this house (and where we'd move to after this based on school system, Jewish population and proximity to where we think my parents will be by then), how long I'll be working at my current job, whether to get a second dog... everything.

Julie said...

And my word verification was just "meth frog." What???

Dan and Emily said...

I drive a 2009 Toyota Corolla. I love it. It's small and compact, but still comfortable and has enough space for my long legs (and a car seat). I live in an area that just got 17.7 inches of snow yesterday. The Corolla does just fine in bad weather. Our lease is up in a few months. We'll probably either look at the Corollas again or upgrade to a Camry.

Unknown said...

Car shopping can be fun, but mostly it's a research odyssey! We went car shopping last year, and test drove a Subaru Forester, Toyota RAV4, and Hyundai Santa Fe. Yeah, I was preggo at the time (though not for long, sadly) so we wanted room for a car seat and all our crap.

We fell hard for the Subaru Forester and bought it. It had the best handling, best gas mileage, best cargo room (for stuff, car seats, and adults), and best visibility. Plus it's top-rated in Consumer Reports (which was our primary consideration). They also last practically forever.

Seriously. Test drive one. I double dog dare ya! LOL

Julie said...

i drive a 2009 ford fusion, and love it. we, too, were shopping for a "family car," bought it 2 weeks before our first IUI, took 4 IUI's to get pregnant, 6 months later our son was stillborn, so that backseat is still empty, a year and a half after buying the car. the "sync" feature where i can make phone calls completely hands-free w/ voice control is my favorite feature. my dad's a ford retiree and we got to use his purchase benefit, so we got a great price.

Carli said...

I can completely empathize with this post. The fertile population has no clue that the infertiles have such a hard time shopping for cars because of the "what if" factor.
For the 5 1/2 years of our infertility, I fought with my DH over why he could NOT buy a 2 seater convertible - "what if next month we finally get pregnant? There would be no where in your car for the car seat???"

As far as suggestions on cars - I drive a Subaru Outback and I LOVE LOVE LOVE it. It has plenty of space for the passengers, plenty of room in the back, and I love the fact that it is sporty/outdoorsy. And, they are made in America by American workers. (Sorry, got a little political, didn't I?)

Best of luck in your search!

Anonymous said...

I'm on the none too fun secondary infertility train for the last 22 mos, and drive a mazda 5. You know, the one that's a mini minivan. I had counted on getting a second kid quite some time ago, so it seems silly hauling one kid around in a minivan, but I figured I had better sell my first car before the second kid arrived because there wasn't room for two carseats in it. I could've saved tons of moulah and just kept that first car as it turns out. At this rate the one infant carseat we already have will be expired before kid #2 arrives on scene.

Hope all the hopeful (wistful?) planning on your part turns out better than mine has so far.

Gwen said...

In favor of the mini, they're freaking huge now, even compared to when they were first reintroduced a few years ago. Good luck with your car shopping

Jacky said...

I love my highlander!! Drives great and plenty of room for stuff and/or carseats!!

decemberbaby said...

We bought a Yaris hatchback (4-door) at the beginning of our infertility journey. In retrospect we should have bought something a little larger, but I was adamant about buying for the life I currently had, not for the one I dreamed of. Five years later we've got two carseats in the back and the trunk can hold our (not small) stroller. I love it.